Vanessa Van Petten – Advice on Reaching Net Generation Teens!

It wasn’t all that long ago that we published a piece called “Is Anything More Challenging than Teaching a Group of Teenagers?” In fact, most parents find it incredible that any teacher could actually get the undivided attention of a group of teens never mind actually teach them.

Today we turn to Vanessa Van Petten, a former teenager and the editor of the web site “Teens Today with Vanessa Van Petten,” for some first hand advice regarding this age group. Of course we adults can all make a claim of having once been a teenager but Ms. Van Petten seems to have been paying more attention during her teen years than this author ever did.

Van Petten has been featured as the Young Parenting Expert in the Wall Street Journal, the Santa Monica Daily Press, World Journal, and Atlanta Insite Magazine. Her guest appearances include the Greg Mantell Show, Playboy Radio and numerous other radio and internet podcast shows.

She is also the author of the book “You’re Grounded!” – a parenting book written from a young person’s perspective. Yes, Vanessa did in fact write the book when she was a teenager.

As for her web site, Vanessa refers to it as “an active blog for parents who want to know what their kids are really doing online, at High School parties or when parents are looking the other way.” We found that her web site truly represents a candid and youthful perspective on the issues facing teens and parents today. The site contains a wealth of short articles and links to a variety of resources.

We had a chance to chat with this bright and talented young lady, asking her a number of questions about teens. As we did so, we sought out her advice as to how she could help educators gain greater insight into this challenging age group.

Your web site has a very ingenious sub header: “Exposing the Net Generation … A Gen Y Perspective on Teens and Parents.” Can you tell us just what you mean by this phrase and correspondingly how this fits with your blog?

Yes, this was a fun one to come up with. I talk a lot about teens and young people, but did not want to limit my readers and my writings to just teens because many things that are going on with the Internet, cell phones, and drugs are unfortunately starting as early as 7! So I use the term net-generation to include 7-25, those of us who were really born into the computer age. I am 22, so I am also part of this net-generation, which can also be called Gen Y or millennials. I think what sets my website apart from others is that I am actually a part of this generation. Many other parenting sites or advice sites for adults about youth are written by other adults—but it is so hard for them to really know what is going on for us! Therefore, I try to ‘expose’ or be a little window into our complex worlds.

You have one very intriguing category on your site – I believe it is called Operation Oprah? Could you give our readers a sense of your posts in this category?

I love Oprah and her message. One of my goals is to bring my message–of bridging the gap between net-geners and adults–to her wide reach. Adults–teachers, grandparents, parents, therapists, counselors need to work really hard to keep up with all of the stuff we are doing online and try to stay two steps ahead. We need to work together to keep kids safe and I think that Oprah could really help spread this message. Therefore, this section of my website is about my trials trying to get Oprah’s attention and what I have gone through as a teen entrepreneur–I started my website when I was a teenager. I also write about starting my business in this section, which is less for parents and more for my entrepreneurial readers–many teens who want to start their own business online. I used my allowance (my parents did not know) to hire 6 employees in India to help get my website launched, make school flashcards and do other busy work so I could write my book and make money passively online–this is a whole new generation and I explain this in the Operation Oprah section!

We see where your book, “You’re Grounded!: How to Stop Fighting and Make the Teenage Years Easier,” is very positively described at Amazon.com. Can you tell us a little bit about the book, what you did for research as well as what were some of your key findings?

I wrote the book when I was 17 based on about 700 interviews I did across the country with other teenagers. I asked them: “If you could tell your parents anything, what would it be? and why haven’t you already told them?” The book started off as just a manuscript of these amazing interviews and then I began to add my own anecdotes, tips, strategies and advice for adults and kids to get along. I also published a few sections on the overview for adults about what is going in our lives at school, the pressure to get into college, go to parties, etc, so adults could get an idea.

Some of my key findings were that teenagers really do listen to adults – they just pretend they are not listening. And another thing that I think shocks many parents is that many of the teens I interviewed did drugs because they were bored–not because they were curious, or because they wanted to rebel! When I was at Emory University in Atlanta, GA, getting my BA, I realized that this is really, really true–and very sad.

Would you consider any one of your findings particularly important for teachers?

I think there is a lot in the book for teachers because I interviewed many of them for the book. The most important thing that I found was that teenagers put a lot of weight on what their teachers say. Now, as a 22-year-old looking back, I remember more of the advice that my great teachers gave me than my parents! I think at the ages of 14-16, more than anything, teenage brains are like sponges in terms of emotional intelligence. I constantly stress on my blog and in my book that parents must find mentors for their kids because these mentors can have such a great impact. Many teens find mentors in their teachers and are truly influenced by not only what they say, but how they dress, their self-esteem and the way they carry themselves. Of course, even the teacher I was close with, I did not know much about their personal lives. But I knew they were happy intelligent people and so valued learning. I have carried these ideas into my current career and life.

I see where you recently did a post on the new book, “The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything).” Recently we have also seen research indicating clear differences between boys and girls regarding how their brains actually function and how they learn. Can you give any advice to teachers of teens that would help ensure their classroom is a great place to learn for both boys and girls?

This is a tough one. Boys tend to be very outgoing in class and certain girls are brave to speak out, but then you also have the ones who will never speak. I think the best way to approach the boy/girl learning gaps is to shake up habits. Students get into habits, sit in the same seats, like certain lessons not others, have good days of the week and bad. If teachers change this, I think they can also get kids a little more out of their comfort zone and willing to break down traditional barriers. For example, I liked when my teacher did activities in focus groups, then partners, then boys vs. girls, then pair up with the first letter of your name, all of these split-groupings actually forces students to rejoin the classroom and see their peers in a new light.

On your web site you have a wealth of short posts, “5 Tips: Get Teens Interested in Politics“, “Best Stocking Stuffers for Teens“, “Teen Slang: Decoding What Kids Are Saying,” etc. One such post is obviously just for educators. Could you give our readers a brief overview of your post, “7 Ways Teachers Can Use Online Tools to Keep Students Interested?“

This was a fun post to write and I love talking to teachers because they are more plugged in than parents about what teens are really doing.

A quick summary:

1) Form and join teacher communities to stay informed about new advances and ideas to keep everything in the class fresh.

2) Use class blogs to keep students involved on a more informal level and get them engaged even outside of class.

3) Use wiki’s because it is such a cool tool to capture a fleeting net-gener’s interest!

4) Use videos and video sharing sites to shake-up the traditional learning environment and give a different perspective on a previously discussed topic.

5) Have some fun and join a bunch of teacher social networking sites–great fun and it gives an idea of what teens are doing on Facebook!

6) Use email, web chats and video chats to encourage modern day pen pals so students can get more of an international perspective.

7) Lastly I list a few different ‘cool tools’ for teachers to teach different lessons like Morse code and Google sites.

And could we intrude on you to maybe give us a list, not sure the number that goes with it, but the _____ list of things that every teacher must know to be able to teach teens effectively?

To make it short and sweet:

1) Be willing to laugh easily: We take ourselves way to seriously.

2) Have set rules: If teens know they can push you, they will.

3) Yet have flexibility in between the rules: This might sound contradictory, but as a teen I always really respected teachers that had set limits, but could relax and have fun in the meantime. Like, we could not get off topic for more than three minutes in math class, but if we had a funny story we could tell it under those three.

4) Please use videos: I do not know what it is, but even when it is a video about cellular respiration it really breaks up the day and teens love it!

5) Try to use some cool tools: Using a blog, wiki, twitter, TeacherTube or some other new type of site to show teens you are trying – it really helps keep their attention.

6) Teens want more responsibility: I do not mean homework, but I think honor systems work really well, and the more you treat teens like adults, the more they rise to the occasion!